Here are 24 reasons why windows is not a virus:

1. Viruses are free.
2. Viruses can be gotten from any good bbs.
3. If detected soon enough, most viruses can be removed from your computer without a huge loss of data and time.
4. Viruses don't take up HUGE wads of disk space.
5. Viruses don't need 4meg of ram to run.
6. Viruses do something.
7. Viruses come in flavors, not just one-size-fits-all.
8. Viruses use the "cutting edge" programming skills to make themselves less noticable. (untill they are ready to be noticed)
9. Viruses don't have major bugs. (if they do, then they don't work, so they're not virus')
10. Viruses don't have three different sets of documentation that is all mixed up and wrong.
11. Viruses don't leak things to the press about the upcomming Jerusalem 95, to keep people from switching to Michelangelo/2 Warp or better yet, XJerusalem.
12. Viruses don't put out stupid two page adds in magazines centered around the march 6 "activate button".
13. Viruses arn't on every computer.
14. Viruses don't have stupid wizards.
15. Who cares if a virus is 16 bit, even though it is advertised as 32?
16. Viruses don't say that they are user "friendly", when they arn't.
17. Viruses can run on PCDOS without warnings.
18. Viruses when installing themselves don't try to send private info about your computer over the phone lines to microstoned-net.
19. Viruses install themselves.
20. Viruses don't try to push out all compitition. They just try to do their job.
21. Viruses maker's don't try to buy Intuit (makers of Quicken (wouldn't that be fun, America's biggest finacial software company owned by a virus maker))
22. Viruses don't invade and take over PC Magazine, filling it with 100% junk on Win95.
23. Viruses don't try to copy what Apple does.
24. There are programs you can buy, or get free to remove viruses.